ada apa dengan cinta? ( whats wrong with love)

Oh the poet of love

Let it caress you beautifully

Personalify my soul

And be honest with your heart

What is wrong with the love

The difference between you and me

Let it rhyme

In a ravishing love poetry

Even if the earth would torn into two

We would still clinging to each other..

( translated from Ada apa dengan cinta by melly and eric)

story so far.

You know the part that you doubt yourself? I still do, I just realize so much has change and happen, I still am the way I am.

I know i'm not all popular, mostly invisible, I do what I can, and was taught to do.

I don't loathe at people who obviously do things better than me, but sometimes I just loathed me.

A week passed, and well, I learned something. I actually can do a lot, even though I am not really happy, I really do try. Or at least fake it.

Lately, I'm drown to books written by Mathew Reiley. He is action pack filled author, feels like I'm reliving the thrill I had with watching Indiana Jones movies when I read his books.

Honestly, I love clubbing, not for the sake of getting drunk and all, but you know, the dancing to good djs' , an well with someone you love is worth it.

Well, good for me to know that my mom and the rest of siblings has busted me again for hanging out with my bf, and ask me not to lie again. It really hard not to, since they disapprove of our relationship so much and that, not to complain he is a DJ, not many close minded parents can accept. Meanwhile, i think they now semi-approve us. I haven't mention to them that we go there by bike, if not...TANG TANG TANG......HEll shall break lose again.

Sometimes, i wonder how long I have to fight so many things in one time, when I still have a hard time believing my self. In some things, well, I have pride, a proud girl I can be. Others, (well most) ...not really.

So yes! I can do it!

doooddddleeee

My life is not all colorful,

more shades of gray than i can count,

Always wonder what beyond,

That rainbow side,

I doubt there is a leprechaun,

I know the grass will be greener

How do I get there?

I'm not a little girl

I'm all wise either,

I am of "becoming"

But of what i can't decide

I wish fate and destiny

Were written not so vaguely

The night sky don't shine so much anymore,

The stars don't say a thing,

The sun blaze its yellow light,

But it has never mention why.

Hence, where can i find my answer,

if i can't find it up there in the sky?

Confused, indecisive,

is not how i like it,

Back full burden past,

Front so strange and unlikely,

Where can I go?

Lost and alone,

you can't say i'm not,

Where can i find who i am?

for no friend nor foe i know,

and all but loneliness i hold.